Tuesday, November 18, 2008

the public got a little more public

It's hilarious that after I have to write a paper for class, the topic presents itself in my daily world. Perhaps it makes you more aware, but I think its coincidence.
Riding the bus yesterday was showing some serious lack in candidates for blog-central. But, I didn't lose hope. Because even with my headphones BLARING my "GET WET DISC 2" compilation I made, I still heard "IT." And yes, I did say CD, my iPod has been on a 3 week hiatus from my life, and I found my "car ready anti-skip" SONY walkman from high school when iPods were just a glimmer in Mac's sac. Anyways, this paper I wrote was the arising issue of cell phone users in public places polluting "air space" asking if there should be a law passed banning users from certain public places because of personal space issues. Not everyone want's to hear about your Gyno appointment yesterday with the hot doctor probing you while I'm waiting for my bread sticks at Olive Garden. Just sayin. Public places, just got a lot more public. So this "gal" on the bus.... Now, I know a thing or two about loud talking, I myself practice the art of it, but I also practice the art of not being a rude bitch. The entire 30 minute ride, I heard this lady's conversation through my obscenely loud Cam'ron. "HEYLOOOO, you tell Raheem that Tisha is fuckin pickin up da caur, so fuck Ray Ray cuz I'm en LA and it's all dat muthafugahz fauwlt." Along with this atrocious conversation, corresponding hand gestures and movements followed while bouncing on the bench seat diagonally from me. I feared, even in my sunglasses, to look in the general direction for the pure reason that her hot pink tipped nails reached over 2 inches long and looked like they had some dried blood under them. She got this real classy ass outfit on, rockin a T-Mart brand opal white puffy jacket (uh, bitch it's like 87 degrees outside), a sparkly glitter tube top and some nasty ass pink flip flops what looked like spray painted cardboard they were so worn. There is absolutely nothing wrong with dressing cheap, as long as you don't look it. Because although she did have her nails did, they weren't even airbrushed or bedazzled. There's a fine line. Now continuing, beyond her infectious personality, she was also a real sweet heart. Because a this gentleman hobbled onto the bus with a mother fucking neck brace at the ripe age of a possible 65 fighting for a seat before the bus' abrupt start would surly send him on to back brace as well, and he lost at all costs at the seat game. This ravishing work of art lady has her legs stretched out over the 3 wide bench seat and refuses to move her legs. I'm appalled, not only does she have a piece of work mouth, but her manners are through the roof. But I'm sure on her "walk of shame" to the bus in her cardboard shoes, she would need to put those feet up. So me being the kind citizen I am, and on the verge of tears every single time I see an elderly person, I offer up my seat to the man. I spend the rest of my ride listening to loud mouth mcgee wave her hands around like she was landing planes at LAX and talk shit about Ray Ray and the word "muthafugah" enough to send me to the next millennium, even with my precious mouth, I was over it. So after writing this paper saying there should NOT be a ban on use of cellular devices in public areas, I decided to change my thesis.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

OH YOU WON'T THROW THAT...

As much as I bitch and complain slash love the bus, that should be my ONLY means of transpiration. One being, driving with half of you, I swear to God, I might as well just sit in an oversized tire and roll myself around traffic, because that actually seems more than 3/4 safer than putting a strap-o-death over me while in your passenger seat. Leave the fast driving to Dale, the power slides to tokyo drifting and driving slower than my rock tumbler polishing my geo's to the old people, and for fuck sake, learn to how to merge this isn't "CLUELESS". The only person I can stand driving with is Martine, mostly because we've had 5 years of WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT 3 LANE CHANGE and SLOW THE FUCK DOWN SPEED RACER to get a happy middle ground. But people as a mass, should never drive. Everyone thinks they are impeccable at driving, even the DMV lady that passed me and I wasn't even sure she could touch the steering wheel past that "extra love" layer she hung out with. Not having a car has forced me to fall in love with LA's WORST fucking transportation system, but also a new appreciation for bikers. And I really am not talking about the Lance's that prance around in their unitards, I'm talking about the jawn's that wear their Carl's Jr. uniform and bike to work. You are the lone ranger, not in a Tour De Prance circle jerk. While you ride, your main objective is not to reach your destination, but to not get fucking hit. I have learned on the mean streets of LA, no one fucking cares, and if you're on a bike, you're fucked. NO ONE PAYS ANY FUCKING ATTENTION, I knew this from years of car accidents I was apart of or had the chance to witness. But while biking, you might as well throw yourself on the hood of that car, because it's going to happen anyways.
In the span of a less than 30 minute trip to 7-11 and back from the library, I almost got hit 5 fucking times, 3 from the same parking lot. I did the whole, raise your arms up and yell mean shit thing, but this one bitch.... this ONE FUCKING BITCH. Yeah, fuck you and your Michael's craft store experience because you almost made me into a "RED ASPHALT" statistic. We'll say her name is "Yvon" (cos its a French ass name) and we'll say she was going MACH 24 in a parking lot as she was approaching the street to exit, I am on the side walk (because if you know anything about riding a bike down here, you don't ride in the street if you want to live, kinda like an Arnold thing to say...but true) riding my 7 speed listening to my jams because thats the only way I roll. Yvon over here, doesn't even look, I'm almost positive she didn't even look at the traffic she was merging into, just was going to "chance it" and see how it worked out, and I'm approaching. I'm in the right because I'm pretty much in the drive way by this point and she still hasn't seen me, I freak. What is this bitch doing, are you seriously going to hit me with your Lexus SUV? Still doesn't see me, no way am I going to make it across the drive way so I stop because she's fucking hitting the NOS tanks to get into the street and out of this parking lot. STILL DOESN'T FUCKING SEE ME! My only reaction is to throw my hot dog bun full of condiments (my dinner) at this bitches fucking wack ass car, it splatters and she halts. She tries to scream at me, I'm all thinking you know whattt YOU'R RIGHT, I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T BE ALIVE BIKING ON A PUBLIC STREET IN THE WAY OF YOUR INDIE 5000. So me being the bitch I am stop right in front of her car and proceed to say "OH WELL HELLO THERE TOO, YOU FUCKING DUMB CUNT. I'M SO GLAD YOU HAVE A LICENSE AND I DON'T, MAYBE YOU SHOULD PAY ATTENTION AND GET THE FUCK OFF MY EARTH." I at that point was amused, she was furious. I'm thinking, yes, get mad, you almost killed me, makes sense, and rode on. Riding a bike in LA, fucking sucks. People fucking suck. It's just me and the metro from here on out.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

escuche por favor mi CD

With all the tax dollars I'm paying, I'm so thankful that its going to my flat screen entertainment on the metro. Now if they'd show "Transit TV" in ENGLISH. However it does have "Transit Trivia" testing my useless knowledge of "what was the name of the bomb dropped on Hiroshima?" and "the first street in Los Angeles was?" Of course, these questions, my stock tips and the Bio of an inner city up and coming rap artist are in English... But HEY! I sure as fuck could sell you some CDs in Spanish now, at least I have something to fall back on, just incase the whole bachelor's degree thing doesn't work out.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

STOP THE H8

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness."
- Declaration of Independence


Today's entry, has nothing to do with the metro, but shouldn't be overlooked non the less. For all of those who voted YES on 8, I do not wish harm on you, but however the power of knowledge and the understanding of love without barriers. I have supported rights of all people since I knew right from wrong while exercising my freedom of choice and speech, with or without my parents support. All people should be granted civil rights, and the right to love regardless, this is fucking America. I was at the PRO-GAY protest in Hollywood tonight, I was there to do something I believe in, in hopes of a better future for man kind where we all are united and blind to differences. We made signs "I BELIEVE IN SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND HATE," chanting "BLACK WHITE GAY STRAIGHT WE WANT EQUALITY" etc, and marched down Santa Monica Blvd. with over 20,000 people strong who supported genderless love. We shut down streets and made a point to be heard. I was stricken with such compassion and hope, it was so beautiful to see people coming together for a common goal. It was extremely emotional for me to see such love in an unloving world.
Land of the free? When did Rights turn into a Vote? We are all human beings, why don't you try to fucking treat each other as such. How does someone else's love affect your daily life? Because your selfish choice affects theirs. So when do Gay's have the right to vote on YOUR marriage? Everyone wants Peace and Happiness, so who's going to make the first move? Never has there ever been such an opportunity for change. Understanding is the road to repair.  

I'm going to look back on this when I'm older and tell my kids that I stood up for a just cause that I had nothing to do with. I may not be gay, but I don't believe banning Gay marriage is right in any sense, nor is banning it going to save the world. We have bigger fish to fry.

Monday, November 3, 2008

SEXY BOD

Oh, odd, I had to run for the bus, again. I'm sure everyone on the metro gets a good laugh at the short girl running with a back pack. It reminds me of middle school where all the kids would sprint to the cafeteria like they were going to run out of french fries as soon as the bell rang. Those with wheelie backpacks were prayed on, in the span of 3 years I more than likely kicked over 300 and twisted some arms. I guess karma's a bitch? Because now I look like the 22 year old idiot. 

What very well could have been an uneventful metro ride texting Rashod about how I apparently look like a bike punk today, turned beautiful. Just because I ride a bike and wear double hooded jackets with painted on skinny jeans doesn't mean i ride a fix gear, its a 7 speed, the EZ rider BIG PURP is RIP-in. Back to the beautifulness of this bus ride. Now, in class I had to write a paper about a "black" vs "white" nation and being a certain way shouldn't be associated with a color, so right now I guess I'm being an extreme hypocrite, but I'll leave that discussion for my Journalism class. This lovely character was a hefty male that I'll roughly judge being in his 30's. 30 and flirty, nothing wrong with that age, its just a number people. But however, what did put a sparkle in my eye was his overall appearance and demeanor. 

He had on a wife beater where his bitch tits were hanging out the sides along with his connecting chest to pit hair, which really made me warm inside. Top shelf though, was the do rag he had over his long blonde hair in a pony tail that looked longer than mine. As my eyes were having a buffet of pure goodness to devour, I noticed some crafty forearm tattoos. How hood. Determining if it was Times New Roman or Ariel font was the hard part, but there was no denying that they said "THUG LIFE." I'm not positive what he was listening to if it was Trick Daddy or Clipse, but he was rocking out so so hard and pouting his lips, I'm positive he was rocking the bus not the shit-for-a-road LA pavement. I mean, because when I listen to Trick Daddy or Clipse I make shit bounce, just sayin. Enough of me, more Don Gudio. As I watched this majestic creature in his element like a rare unicorn, I couldn't help but have extreme appreciation for his lack of care, not only for his appearance, but because he made over exaggerated movements to zip his fly up. I made it apparent I was staring too, I went as far as to take a picture with my phone (will post later when LAVC wifi stops sucking monster cock). He was quite the classy individual though, for when he straight up buck nocked the girl next to him, he apologized in the most sheepish feminine voice I would have never expected out of this beast. I left him today on the bus, but his memory will live on burned in my skull for at least a few days. "You won't fuck him," you know what Rashod, you're right. Next time, though....

On the way home a lady in her 60s was listening to "Sexual Healing" by Marvin Gaye on a disc man. Just thought you should know that people still use disc mans and bitches in their 60s still like to get down.


PS. 

I know that these tables are open to all over LAVC, but when someone is sitting alone and being quite doing work, don't fucking slam down your obnoxious Victoria's Secret Pink tote bag on my picnic table and bring your fucking study group to reek havoc in my area, I don't give one fuck what you got wrong on your Bio test. I'm enjoying the outsideness via wifi, FUCK OFF. Sooo I'll just turn up At The Gates on my iTunes. Didn't like that too much, huh? Fancy that.




Dirt Nasty - 1980

"I ain't no amateur, this isn't hands across america, I lived though the 80s, an shit was crazy"